I recently heard from a bride whose wedding was scheduled for the early fall. I was to be their officiant and she notified me the wedding has been cancelled. The young woman apologized and said very little else, but I was moved to respond. I remember her as lovely (as was the groom-to-be). They looked like they were made to be together, a picture perfect look of compatibility.
I emailed back how I wished her well and let her know how brave and wise she is to take this action now. I know many who have known they shouldn't marry months ahead or weeks ahead, but went ahead anyway. All are divorced today. She and he must be in extraordinary pain, the kind we feel when we somehow assume we've let everyone down.
Weddings are for ourselves and for others. But marriage is not for others. The family and friends don't go home with us to our households, to our kitchens and bedrooms, to our bank accounts and our dreams and our longings and our anger, sadness, and deepest longings for true intimacy. We only know the truth of what we feel can work well very deeply inside us and we must feel that strongly in the midst of being tested. And the weeks and months leading up to a wedding are a test in itself.
So this sadness, this loss, this disappointment will pass. These two will be better off and they deserve the best their courage can provide them.
No comments:
Post a Comment