When I was in training as a Celebrant, they told us to remind every bride, when finishing her plans for her special day, to include a TFM--Trusted Family Member. This is the person who is looking out for YOU and for all the tiny, sometimes petty details that will make a big difference to the flow of your day and to the flawless ceremony you want.
What does the TFM do? S(he) has everyone's cell phone number and calls potential latecomers to the rehearsal. She has the extra matches (tapered) for your Unity Candle and whips them out if the caterer or wedding venue falls short. She meets the delivery truck with your outdoor chairs in the town park one hour before the wedding and she tells them how to set them up (they don't necessarily think about which way the sun will set, or where on the gazebo you will stand and how far away from the steps to place the guests. She will place the single roses in the men's lapels and calm the ring bearer and flower girl long before they have a chance to fall apart.
Some of this job can be done by a wedding planner; some is best done by a close family member. Often this is the bride's mother, but not always. The overbearing mother could do more harm than good. Just remember, a good TFM is priceless. I have stepped in to this role several times and I don't mind, even though I'm limited because of my obvious other role, but if it's all decided ahead of time and there's one previously designated person, it's a big pain reliever. It's just three letters: TFM. Memorize that.
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